8. Go to counseling with my husband.
Another straightforward goal? Eh, sort of. My marriage is strong, but we aren’t the best communicators. And we’ve been having variations on a handful of the same arguments for just about 15 years. We’re lucky that we are crazy committed to each other and our marriage, and we’re even luckier that we still complete enjoy each others’ company.
But yes, we need to learn how to talk to each other about things that hurt us. We need to finally resolve some issues, or at least learn to agree to disagree. Mostly, we need to learn methods to deal with each other when our feelings are hurt or we’re angry, so that we don’t say hateful things or do destructive things.
I’m proud that my husband is taking action on his own to reach out to an anger management therapist. We’ve each gone to therapy separately in the past. I don’t really understand my/our hesitation to just do the marriage counseling, because god knows we’ve been talking about going for almost as long as we’ve been together. Denial, laziness, I’m not sure.
We’re each working on making a lot of changes this year, and self actualization is driving many of them. Becoming our best selves will surely help our marriage. We’re already being more thoughtful and calm when we’re starting to get angry. I’m looking forward to finding someone to help us with this challenge.